LegMistress . . . continued
I have included for your amusement a feeble attempt at describing a meeting with me, entitled Prelude to My First Meeting with Leg Mistress
The lower case I in place of I when referring to the first person, is not a mistake, he is a slave in training and is not allowed to enunciate "I". He has not yet earned the right to have his wishes taken into account.
By slave in training david
My heart was racing for weeks before our first meeting... i was jumpy, nervous, and it seemed that She was all i could think of. Somewhere in the back of my mind, the thoughts of making a good impression on Her were always humming, like an engine that could not be switched off. Day and night, i was turning the images from my months of training and anticipation of our first encounter over and over and over in my head...particularly on the flight over to southern Spain, when i couldn't sleep a wink.
When i arrived at the airport, and had proceeded through immigration and customs, i saw a uniformed male chauffeur holding a simple card up that read "Leg Mistress;s slave david." While none of the Spaniards seemed to pay any attention to it, several English and Americans from the flight pointed to it, wide-eyed and laughing - wondering if it is a joke. i couldn't help but blush bright red; and with my mouth dry and my heart pounding against my chest, i walked over to the man and told him that i was slave in training david. He gave me a warm welcome, as if we were compatriots, and led me to the parked car. On the drive to Mistress_ home, he cheerfully showed me some of the countryside around Malaga, cheerfully telling me about how long he had been in Her service and how it had changed his life for the better. Despite his efforts to calm me, my heart still seemed to remain in my throat...but i was at least feeling that i was not alone. He had been through the same training program i had, gotten past his first meeting with Mistress, and was welcoming me as a "brother in servitude." I asked him what i should expect and what i should do when we arrive. He told me to be patient and to wait until Mistress explained it to me, as the orientation of each new slave-in-training is different and individually tailored by Mistress according to what his or her training has revealed about them.
As we entered the driveway to her palatial home, he closed the gate behind us and the car glided up to a side door marked "servants' entrance." He told me that he would take my bags inside and put them away, as i had better not keep Mistress waiting. She was expecting me at 9 a.m. sharp in her den, and it is already 8:50 a.m. He directed me through the back to a closed door and told me to go inside; take off all of my clothes and put them in a basket i would find in the corner; go to the center of the room and kneel upright in the "Listen" position, with my knees just behind a thin line i would see marked on the floor. i was to spread my knees as far apart as i can and clasp my hands clasped behind my back, eyes cast downward, and await Mistress' arrival.
|In those few minutes waiting for Leg Mistress, my head was filled with a dizzying array of thoughts...many which had been simmering for weeks. i wanted to thank Leg Mistress for leading me to this point, this crossroads, and accepting me into Her world. I felt so liberated by the very process of revealing to Her the most intimate and fiercely guarded parts of my mind...those parts which i became aware of in my dreams when i was only 10 years old and thoughts i discovered made me wake up and want to, for some reason, rub my penis to hardness. I wanted to let Mistress know of desires, fantasies and longings i could never reveal to my closest friends, for fear they'd think me a sicko or pervert. She had always allowed me to tell her everything, indeed, she had positively encouraged me to reveal all my fantasies, longings and fears. i felt vindicated, after so many years, for having decided not to marry several women who would have never understood or been able to deal with my innermost desires to serve a strong, dominant Woman. I always feared that they would lose all respect for me as a man if they learned the truth. But at that moment of truth, while waiting for Mistress to arrive, i was immensely thankful to Her and knew that all the years of loneliness had been worth going through. The one thought that had kept me going over those many years was the dream of finding a Woman such as Her, who understood Her power over me, my deep desire to serve Her and who actually respected me for it. i knew that i was a very valuable asset and human being to Her...and that made me feel on top of the world! Showing my gratitude and proving to Mistress that i was worthy of Her time, training, trust, love and respect was uppermost in my mind.
Thoughts of how i best serve Her ran through my mind. i would try my best to serve Her by freeing myself of any negative connotations to slavery that had been deeply ingrained in me over my lifetime and to be totally open to responding fully, and without hesitation, to whatever Mistress wanted me to do for You. My goal would be to be open, take a deep breath and dive in with both feet...to learn, to try, to respond to Her commands and wishes before thinking about how degrading something seemed to be, or how i had always been turned off by a particular act...and to stay totally focused on several key things. First, that Mistress_ pleasure, comfort, needs and desires were and always must be paramount to anything else. Second, that Mistress knew exactly what She was doing, that She would never cause any undue physical or emotional harm to me. Mistress_ goal was to make me into the best slave that i could be - and while i may not understand or appreciate what She directs or expects me to do, i would remember that She has that goal in mind and knows how to achieve it. Mistress knows what is best for me in this, Her arena. Third, if i am ever going to achieve real peace in this lifetime, i must give this process my best effort! If i did not, i would never forgive myself. Every minute of every day must be focused on making Her life easier and more pleasurable - and my goal would be to make Mistress pleased with and proud of me...to become one of Her most highly valued slaves in all respects. i knew that i needed to do this successfully. After all, it was, in the final analysis, what would make me happy. It was my destiny. It was my way of showing love...
|I thought about what success or failure here mean to me here. In a word, Everything. As a submissive, i wanted my life to revolve around Mistress. I wanted my life to be all about Her - about pleasing Her, serving Her, anticipating Her every need and want. It would give me great pleasure to know that i succeeded in getting to that rarified place where it would be almost impossible to displease Her, as i could not refuse Her anything...a place where i could look at Mistress and see reflected in Her eyes Her acceptance and joy in having me as Her trusted slave. The joy and warmth that i would gain from that would, i thought, become addictive.
Yet i knew that it would not be an easy task, no matter how long i have dreamed of becoming a slave. Having lived half of my life in a different reality, where my responsibility has been only to myself, and my ego has been a strong factor, that part of me would not be easy to cast aside. For most of my life, i have had a strong, assertive personality. Many of my actions, instincts and thoughts while in the real world (i.e., outside of my fantasies), did, in some instances, run counter to the concept of absolute obedience and slavery.
Parts of the reality of slavery may not come as easily as they did in my imagination. I knew it would be very difficult to reach that ideal place where i would never hold back and developed a whole new pattern of instincts. In all honesty, this would be the first time in my life in which i had found a Woman who truly embodied - and who was - all that i have ever dreamed of in a Mistress to whom i would actually consider enslaving myself. This would be the most important opportunity of my life, my only chance to find true happiness and contentment. To fail, and to lose that opportunity, would be a crushing blow to me. If i completed the process of slave training and, in the end, decided that it was not really for me - that it should remain a fantasy - then i can live with that decision. But if i gave it my best, gave it everything i had and Mistress still found me wanting, then my lifelong dream would shatter before my eyes. That is a possibility i have never really had to face...giving my all to the most important thing in my life and not being good enough to make it happen. I didn't know how i could live with that.
Suddenly i heard the unmistakable click-clack of a woman's high heeled shoes. My heart suddenly raced, my mouth got even dryer and all my senses were on edge. Then the door opened and Leg Mistress walked in...
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